Really. I don't. Nothing.
Maybe I'll think of something.
~K
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Monday, March 19, 2007
A gold miner.....
was injured at work and had have have his right leg amputated. After the operation he mournfully complained to a fellow miner, "I suppose I'm screwed now. Who would ever want a one-legged gold digger?"
"Try Paul McCartney," his friend replied.
That's just wrong. I can't believe I wrote that old Playboy joke here. But I just read that you can bet on whether or not Heather Mills leg will fly off during Dancing with the Stars. Quite frankly, I love how they use the term "fly off." I get a vision of her doing a high kick and the leg flying into the crowd cartoon-style. At worst, I think it would just come disconnected. The media needs to stop getting us all excited that this might happen. However, I am watching tonight just in case.
Moving right along. I have another social dilemma on my hands. I was a witness to a situation this past Saturday. Here's what happened. I was at my local Wal-Mart. I happened to be in the lawn and garden section. There was a guy there looking at patio furniture. Now, this story becomes much funnier because he was one of those guys who has to wear his sunglasses inside. Like he is too cool for Wal-Mart. Anyway, he sits down on one of those cheap one piece plastic chairs and the whole thing immediately collapses! I mean, one of the back legs totally gave way and this guy goes crashing to the floor. Highest of high comedy. He immediately springs up and looks around to see if anybody caught this incident. Here's where the dilemma part comes in. I saw the whole thing and just kept right on walking. Did I need to stop and offer assistance? Honestly, I was just as embarassed watching this thing go down. I felt like I was on one of those hidden camera shows and Chris Hansen was going to pop out and ask why I didn't offer assistance to my fellow shopper. Let me know what you think.
Had a good day today. For various reasons, I had the good fortune to spend a sizeable portion of my afternoon at a local bar. I went there to relax and engage in two of my favorite hobbies: drinking and cigar smoking. The only reason that I bring this up is that there was a young couple in there as well. Well, them and their kid. This kid couldn't have been more than 3 or 4 years old. There he was, saddled up at the bar and learning how to play video poker. I don't even have a joke or a comment here. I think that pretty much says it all.
When does Jack Bauer go to the bathroom?
Ok, thats all for now. Have a great week. Talk to you later.
~Kevin
"Try Paul McCartney," his friend replied.
That's just wrong. I can't believe I wrote that old Playboy joke here. But I just read that you can bet on whether or not Heather Mills leg will fly off during Dancing with the Stars. Quite frankly, I love how they use the term "fly off." I get a vision of her doing a high kick and the leg flying into the crowd cartoon-style. At worst, I think it would just come disconnected. The media needs to stop getting us all excited that this might happen. However, I am watching tonight just in case.
Moving right along. I have another social dilemma on my hands. I was a witness to a situation this past Saturday. Here's what happened. I was at my local Wal-Mart. I happened to be in the lawn and garden section. There was a guy there looking at patio furniture. Now, this story becomes much funnier because he was one of those guys who has to wear his sunglasses inside. Like he is too cool for Wal-Mart. Anyway, he sits down on one of those cheap one piece plastic chairs and the whole thing immediately collapses! I mean, one of the back legs totally gave way and this guy goes crashing to the floor. Highest of high comedy. He immediately springs up and looks around to see if anybody caught this incident. Here's where the dilemma part comes in. I saw the whole thing and just kept right on walking. Did I need to stop and offer assistance? Honestly, I was just as embarassed watching this thing go down. I felt like I was on one of those hidden camera shows and Chris Hansen was going to pop out and ask why I didn't offer assistance to my fellow shopper. Let me know what you think.
Had a good day today. For various reasons, I had the good fortune to spend a sizeable portion of my afternoon at a local bar. I went there to relax and engage in two of my favorite hobbies: drinking and cigar smoking. The only reason that I bring this up is that there was a young couple in there as well. Well, them and their kid. This kid couldn't have been more than 3 or 4 years old. There he was, saddled up at the bar and learning how to play video poker. I don't even have a joke or a comment here. I think that pretty much says it all.
When does Jack Bauer go to the bathroom?
Ok, thats all for now. Have a great week. Talk to you later.
~Kevin
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Better late than never......
You know, its nice to see that everyone eagerly anticipates my weekly posting. Sorry, that I didn't post earlier in the week, but technically Wednesday is AFTER 5 pm on Monday. However, this is probably the busiest I have ever been in my professional career. In fact, I've been so busy that it is now Wednesday and I haven't had time to read the entire issue of Playboy that I got on Saturday. (And yes, I do read the articles.) The good news is that it will hopefully be over (at least for awhile) in another week. In the interest of personal security, I'll follow up with an email filling you in on the details.
Anyway, nothing too exciting to report on. However, I have had the pleasure of having to commute into Center City Philadelphia all this week. It's times like this that I remember why I live in the suburbs. Actually, the process has been much more tolerable than I thought it would be. I made a very wise decision by taking public transportation into the city each day. I just don't think that I could deal with all the hassles that go along with trying to drive in a major city. Everyone is honking at you, there is no where to park, and when you do find a space it costs $25 a day to do so. I take the train, and it lets me read and relax during my trips. Once you figure out how to read the schedule, you find that it's not that scary an experience.
As far as the city goes, the part that I am in is relatively nice. Although, I was walking next to a guy this morning who was carrying a grocery bag full of condoms. Again, this got the 'ol wheels turning. What was the need for this? It wasn't the item I was questioning, but the volume. There literally could have been hundreds of them in there. What was the point? Was this guy a modern day Wilt Chamberlain? Looking to have an interesting water balloon fight? On the way to Paris Hilton's house? The point is, it was weird and it made me think.
Also, where do people in major cities get groceries? First, I just didn't see any grocery stores out there. And even if I did, how would you get the groceries home? If you don't have a car, or its more convenient to walk, you're limited to two bags at the most. (And yes, when I envision groceries, I always think of the TV image of the brown paper bag with the random leafy vegetable and the baguette sticking out.) Do people have to make multiple trips? Do they just eat out all the time? See, these are the kinds of questions that I need answers to.
OK, gotta run for now, but I will talk to you all soon.
~Kevin
Anyway, nothing too exciting to report on. However, I have had the pleasure of having to commute into Center City Philadelphia all this week. It's times like this that I remember why I live in the suburbs. Actually, the process has been much more tolerable than I thought it would be. I made a very wise decision by taking public transportation into the city each day. I just don't think that I could deal with all the hassles that go along with trying to drive in a major city. Everyone is honking at you, there is no where to park, and when you do find a space it costs $25 a day to do so. I take the train, and it lets me read and relax during my trips. Once you figure out how to read the schedule, you find that it's not that scary an experience.
As far as the city goes, the part that I am in is relatively nice. Although, I was walking next to a guy this morning who was carrying a grocery bag full of condoms. Again, this got the 'ol wheels turning. What was the need for this? It wasn't the item I was questioning, but the volume. There literally could have been hundreds of them in there. What was the point? Was this guy a modern day Wilt Chamberlain? Looking to have an interesting water balloon fight? On the way to Paris Hilton's house? The point is, it was weird and it made me think.
Also, where do people in major cities get groceries? First, I just didn't see any grocery stores out there. And even if I did, how would you get the groceries home? If you don't have a car, or its more convenient to walk, you're limited to two bags at the most. (And yes, when I envision groceries, I always think of the TV image of the brown paper bag with the random leafy vegetable and the baguette sticking out.) Do people have to make multiple trips? Do they just eat out all the time? See, these are the kinds of questions that I need answers to.
OK, gotta run for now, but I will talk to you all soon.
~Kevin
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Something a little different......
I decided that just talking about how much I hate various companies could get a little boring after a while. For this reason, I am going to switch things up a little and make you think a bit. I am even going to throw in a tasty recipe at the end. You know why? Because I can! When you get your own blog, you can do whatever the hell you want. Today, you're getting my secret to tasty cheesy chicken enchiladas. Deal with it.
Anyway, here's what I wanted to discuss. I have a feeling that this is really going to divide people. You're either going to know exactly what I am talking about, or think I am ready for some sort of mental institution. I sense there's really no in-between here.
Have you ever looked at something a million times and then noticed something that never stood out before? This happened to me a couple of times in the last week. For instance, I just realized last night that my kitchen has a big four foot fluorescent fixture on the ceiling. Now, I have lived in my apartment for nearly two years. And yet, I never took the time to stop and look up. I just flipped on the switch, and went about my business. I have been under that light 10,000 times, but I never could have described it to you. The same thing happens when I drive. I take the same way to work everyday, but every once and a while I will notice a house that never seemed to be there before. Its like that creepy quote from "Red Dragon." I was looking, but I did not see.
So that's your homework for the rest of the week. Take a few moments to stop and see the things that you might have been missing all this time.
Ok, and just so that you don't feel like you waited an extra day for nothing here is my previously top secret recipe for my chicken enchiladas. I have tested these on many people, and they have had excellent reviews. Plus, they are very easy to make and relatively healthy.
Ingredients:
1.5 cups shredded cooked chicken breast (about 2 breasts)
1 cup bottled picante sauce or salsa
1 cup shredded cheese (I like mozzarella)
3 oz low fat cream cheese (this happens to be the size of one of those tiny cream cheese bricks)
1 tsp chili powder
8 flour tortillas
1.5 cups bottled green taco sauce (more on this in a moment)
Directions:
Till next time
~Kevin
Anyway, here's what I wanted to discuss. I have a feeling that this is really going to divide people. You're either going to know exactly what I am talking about, or think I am ready for some sort of mental institution. I sense there's really no in-between here.
Have you ever looked at something a million times and then noticed something that never stood out before? This happened to me a couple of times in the last week. For instance, I just realized last night that my kitchen has a big four foot fluorescent fixture on the ceiling. Now, I have lived in my apartment for nearly two years. And yet, I never took the time to stop and look up. I just flipped on the switch, and went about my business. I have been under that light 10,000 times, but I never could have described it to you. The same thing happens when I drive. I take the same way to work everyday, but every once and a while I will notice a house that never seemed to be there before. Its like that creepy quote from "Red Dragon." I was looking, but I did not see.
So that's your homework for the rest of the week. Take a few moments to stop and see the things that you might have been missing all this time.
Ok, and just so that you don't feel like you waited an extra day for nothing here is my previously top secret recipe for my chicken enchiladas. I have tested these on many people, and they have had excellent reviews. Plus, they are very easy to make and relatively healthy.
Ingredients:
1.5 cups shredded cooked chicken breast (about 2 breasts)
1 cup bottled picante sauce or salsa
1 cup shredded cheese (I like mozzarella)
3 oz low fat cream cheese (this happens to be the size of one of those tiny cream cheese bricks)
1 tsp chili powder
8 flour tortillas
1.5 cups bottled green taco sauce (more on this in a moment)
Directions:
- Preheat the oven to 350 degrees
- Use a large, non-stick skillet coated with cooking spray over medium heat.
- Add the chicken, 1/2 cup of the cheese, the salsa, cream cheese, and chili powder.
- Cook for 3 minutes or until the cheese melts.
- Spoon about 1/3 cup of the chicken mixture down the center of each tortilla and roll up.
- Place the enchiladas in a baking dish and drizzle the taco sauce over top of them.
- Then sprinkle the remaining cheese on top of everything.
- Cover and bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes or until the cheese melts.
- Serve enchiladas immediately.
- Enjoy!
Till next time
~Kevin
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