was injured at work and had have have his right leg amputated. After the operation he mournfully complained to a fellow miner, "I suppose I'm screwed now. Who would ever want a one-legged gold digger?"
"Try Paul McCartney," his friend replied.
That's just wrong. I can't believe I wrote that old Playboy joke here. But I just read that you can bet on whether or not Heather Mills leg will fly off during Dancing with the Stars. Quite frankly, I love how they use the term "fly off." I get a vision of her doing a high kick and the leg flying into the crowd cartoon-style. At worst, I think it would just come disconnected. The media needs to stop getting us all excited that this might happen. However, I am watching tonight just in case.
Moving right along. I have another social dilemma on my hands. I was a witness to a situation this past Saturday. Here's what happened. I was at my local Wal-Mart. I happened to be in the lawn and garden section. There was a guy there looking at patio furniture. Now, this story becomes much funnier because he was one of those guys who has to wear his sunglasses inside. Like he is too cool for Wal-Mart. Anyway, he sits down on one of those cheap one piece plastic chairs and the whole thing immediately collapses! I mean, one of the back legs totally gave way and this guy goes crashing to the floor. Highest of high comedy. He immediately springs up and looks around to see if anybody caught this incident. Here's where the dilemma part comes in. I saw the whole thing and just kept right on walking. Did I need to stop and offer assistance? Honestly, I was just as embarassed watching this thing go down. I felt like I was on one of those hidden camera shows and Chris Hansen was going to pop out and ask why I didn't offer assistance to my fellow shopper. Let me know what you think.
Had a good day today. For various reasons, I had the good fortune to spend a sizeable portion of my afternoon at a local bar. I went there to relax and engage in two of my favorite hobbies: drinking and cigar smoking. The only reason that I bring this up is that there was a young couple in there as well. Well, them and their kid. This kid couldn't have been more than 3 or 4 years old. There he was, saddled up at the bar and learning how to play video poker. I don't even have a joke or a comment here. I think that pretty much says it all.
When does Jack Bauer go to the bathroom?
Ok, thats all for now. Have a great week. Talk to you later.
~Kevin
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4 comments:
I'm torn. You were justified in walking past this douche who caused the collapse of the cheap patio furniture, but you also have an obligation to stop and remind the guy of how big of a douche he is while pointing and laughing. I don't know which option carries more weight.
Who is Jack Bauer? Why do you care when he takes a crap?
You should have asked an associate if you could now purchase the swing very cheaply and repair and resell for a profit
Who gives a shit if that asshole is ok or not. We are a selfish people and have very little regard for others' well being. One of the many reasons I love this country...I write this as I am leaving for church!!!
What fucking swing? Did Kevin ever say anything about a swing? What the fuck James. Reading is fundamental.
Jack Bauer doesn't have to go to the bathroom as his urine is turned into adrenaline for his torture scenes.
Also, Jack Bauer killed Keifer Sutherland the other day, cause nobody plays Jack Bauer!
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