A couple of news items to get to in the post. First, to comment on all the comments that everyone left regarding the Global Warming post, I couldn't agree more. And by saying that, I mean that I agree that you should be agreeing with me. Glad to see that my years of subtle influence are starting to pay off.
Also, I want to comment on a tangent that was started in the comments section regarding the media and their ability to hype certain events. The current floods are a great example of this. Also, is it just me or is this the first time you ever remember weathermen saying that the floods were going to start at a certain time? For those of you who do not live in the northeastern part of the United States, we have had substanial rainfall over the past week. The National Weather Service has been issuing flood watches, warnings, etc. However, last night they actually said that the flooding would start at X hour today. I never remember this before. I thought floods were things that just happened. Like you're at home and sitting in your Lay-Z-Boy and all of the sudden you see the microwave floating by.
As an off-shoot of the Death Pool, we should take side bets on what the most media-hyped event of the summer will be. Last year it was the hurricanes. A few years ago it was shark attacks and the DC sniper. My guess is that this year its going to be either some kind of amusement park ride that kills mutliple people or clowns who moonlight as bankrobbers. Could go either way at this point.
Today I caught wind of a piece of legislation that is currently being debated in the U.S. Senate. Now, realize that we are currently mired in a war that is costing billions of dollars a year, the country lacks universal health care coverage, and the government is starting to pry into our phone records and bank transactions. And we decide to focus our energies here. Awesome. Glad to see that our elected representatives are on top of things. All that money I spent on rhinestone sunglasses and a Don "Magic" Juan replica goblet is down the drain.
Finally, as some of you may know, today is one of my favorite days of year. Why, you ask? Its NBA draft night, thats why. Another year to put the now famous "Cleofus Theory" (you'll have to scroll down a bit) to the test. And I figured that this would be the perfect time to review how wonderfully the Theory performed in the past year. Quite frankly, I haven't seen busts like this since that Jenna Jameson video. My god, I even picked a guy (Fran Vasquez) who didn't even feel like playing in the league last year. Now, I know what you're going to say. "Dumbass, you picked 3/5's (Bogut, Williams, Villanueva) of the league's All-Rookie First Team." It's ok. Genius is often confused with insanity. My only reply is....wait. We'll see how these guys look three seasons from now. By the way, Rookie of the Year, Chris Paul, not on the list. So, score one for the good guys. Expect to see the '06 Cleofus list sometime in the near future.
That's enough for now. I'm going to go put on a poncho and wait for my crib to float away.
~Kevin
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First, I would like to say that we should change the name of the "Cleofus Theory" to the "F@cking Idiot Theory" after its creator. Yet again it is that time of year where Kev weaves a web of bullshit so strong that no human can escape it. I was glad to see that your theory tanked last year. I understand not totally, but enough to make me happy. Also, I am glad to see that you have crumbled under the pressure and now accepted Chris Paul (aka Nut Punch) as a victory. I believe that the theory started with just bad names equal no good. You know why people with good names are successful in the NBA, because the majority of people don't name their kids retarded names like Shithead (actual name of one of my wife’s students pronounced ShiTH-eed). I don’t think his future inmates; I mean roommates will care how it is pronounced, only how it is spelled. The point is, I hate your theory and I hate you. You are worse than the media. Now onto this stupid article you saw. It makes my head hurt. I feel dumber for having read it. We will have to put the word out to all those tax filing pimps (Ice-T) that if they don’t claim all their dependents, they will go to prison for tax fraud. I have an idea, how about just arresting the pimps, and making them the bitches in prison. I am thinking, that may discourage them from becoming repeat offenders. As for Sen. Charles Grassley, R-Iowa, go get a hooker, get laid, and shut the f@ck up. I swear the people leading this country are the dumbest motherf@ckers on Earth. The author of this blog stated it correctly, “Now, realize that we are currently mired in a war that is costing billions of dollars a year, the country lacks universal health care coverage, and the government is starting to pry into our phone records and bank transactions. And we decide to focus our energies here.”
The Chad
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